


Zigzag

by AntarcticBird



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-05
Updated: 2015-01-05
Packaged: 2018-03-05 14:55:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3124319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AntarcticBird/pseuds/AntarcticBird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It's not like it was even a good part,” Kurt says, voice tightly controlled, “but it was at least <i>something</i> for the resume.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Zigzag

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [klaineadvent](http://klaineadvent.tumblr.com/) Day 24: Zigzag
> 
> Also, my 111th Klaine fic on the AO3! \o/

He's on the couch when Blaine comes home, and the TV is on but he can see with a single glance that Kurt's not even watching it. It's late, but he knows that that's not why Kurt is looking so tired.

Quickly, he steps out of his shoes, hangs up his jacket on the hooks by the door, and pads over to him on socked feet, sits sideways on the cushions with one leg folded under himself so he can smile at him.

“Hey,” he greets, trying to sound as softly-cheerful as possible, and Kurt smiles back at him, leans in for a short kiss.

“Hey.”

“How was your day?” Kurt shrugs, turns his attention back to the TV, frowning when he realizes that he's apparently watching some show about the history of rail transport.

He winces. “If I say fine, are you going to believe me?”

Blaine hugs him from the side, kisses his shoulder. “No.”

“I thought so.” Kurt sighs.

“No news yet?” he asks, arms still secure around Kurt, and he wishes he didn't know the answer already.

“Oh, there are news,” Kurt says wryly. “I didn't get the part.”

Blaine cuddles closer to him, and his heart aches. “I'm sorry,” he offers quietly.

“It's not like it was even a good part,” Kurt says, voice tightly controlled, “but it was at least _something_ for the resume.”

“I know.”

“I already called the diner and asked for more shifts,” Kurt assures him. “Until I can get proper work in my chosen profession again -”

“Hey, no.” Blaine rubs his arm reassuringly, kisses his neck. “You'll get something. I know you will. It's hard. I know.”

“Yeah. Thank you.” Kurt sniffs a little. “I'm glad you at least get to do what you love.”

He knows it's meant honestly, Kurt really is happy for him. But still he feels bad sometimes, going to rehearsals, getting to be on stage every night, getting to do what they both want so badly. It's not fair. “I wanted you to get the part,” he tells Kurt.

“I know you did. I know. I wanted it too. It doesn't matter.”

“It matters,” Blaine insists. “You worked hard for it. You deserved it.”

Kurt snorts. “If I deserved it, I would have it now, wouldn't I?”

Blaine pulls back, far enough to meet his eyes. “You know that's not how it works.”

“Yeah, well.” Kurt sighs, lowers his eyes, shakes his head. He looks exhausted. “I know. I do. I know.”

“You're amazing,” Blaine tells him, and he's never meant anything more. “There's no one like you. I don't know why they didn't choose you, but -”

“They're not the only ones who didn't, are they?” Kurt interrupts, and it's more defeat than bitterness.

Blaine leans their foreheads together and it aches how much he wants to fix this for him, he _loves_ him, he can't stand seeing him unhappy. “I'm sorry.”

“Not your fault.”

He cups Kurt's face in both hands and wishes he could absorb all the sadness right out of him, he doesn't know why Kurt can't seem to catch a break, why doesn't everyone love him? “I'm still sorry. I wish I could make it better.”

This is not the first time that one of them has had a streak of bad luck – it happens. Last year it had been Blaine unable to find more than weekend gigs and Kurt the one reassuring him almost daily that it was not because he lacked the drive or the talent. Now Blaine has work and Kurt can't even get a second callback, and it's not fair, but it's the risk of the life they've chosen.

It's a constant up and down, it's unpredictable, the two of them bouncing between extremes, zigzagging their way through the jungle of auditions and sucky plays and singing at weddings, and unemployment, and the occasional big-deal, a-real-part-on-a-real-stage kind of jobs that one of these days, Blaine knows it, will help both of them get where they so desperately want to be.

But for now, it's not easy. It's just never easy.

“What can I do?” he asks, kissing his lips, once, softly. “What do you need? I'll do anything.”

Kurt shakes his head, exhales, mouth twitching in a small, tired smile. “Just … nothing. Just … it's okay. I'm okay. I am feeling a little sorry for myself, but it'll pass. We've both bounced back from worse.”

“Doesn't mean it doesn't suck,” Blaine reminds him. He believes in Kurt like he's never believed in anyone, Kurt will be a star one day, but right now he cuddles into Blaine's embrace, tries making himself smaller, and Blaine holds him close and loves him so much he can hardly breathe. Right now, Kurt is sad and defeated and discouraged and Blaine will do anything anything _anything_ to make him feel better. “I get it,” he promises. “You know I do. I love you. If there's anything I can do, then _please_ let me know, I _love_ you.”

“I know.” Kurt wraps his arms around him and squeezes him tight. “I love you, Blaine,” he says, voice muffled against Blaine's shirt.

“Do you want a cup of tea?” Blaine asks. “I can also run out again real quick and get you cheesecake, this is New York, something will be open -”

“No!” Kurt cuts him off quickly, a little too loud. “Stay,” he adds, more quietly, holding onto him like he'll vanish if he lets go. “Just … stay. Right here. With me. Tell me about your day. I want to hear about it.”

Blaine holds him, and of course he'll stay, if Kurt needs him he'll always always be right here this close to him, _always_. “Kurt, we don't have to talk about it, I'm okay, I know it's hard for you -”

“It's not,” Kurt insists. “This is not. I'm proud of you. I'm happy for you.”

“But you -”

“Please!”

Blaine presses his face against Kurt's shoulder, breathes him in, and feels … too much. “Roger was drunk again,” he says. “I think his understudy will have reason to celebrate soon.”

“Hmm. He didn't fall off the stage again?” Kurt asks.

Blaine laughs. “No. Not since that fateful rehearsal.”

“Did you have fun, though?”

Blaine thinks about it. “Yes. I did,” he admits.

“I'm glad,” Kurt says and Blaine believes him. “Can you get me a ticket one night this week?”

“It's not like we're sold out or anything,” Blaine reminds him.

“I just really want to see it again. I love seeing you on stage.”

Blaine looks into Kurt's eyes and sees nothing but love, support and honesty there. “I love seeing you on stage too,” he says. “And I'm going to. I know it. Very soon!”

Kurt roll his eyes at him and kisses his nose. “If you say so.”

“I say so.”

“Come to bed with me?” Kurt asks, head dropping forward as he yawns into Blaine's shoulder.

Blaine rubs his back and nods. “Of course.”

It's unpredictable, this life. But at least they have each other. And he can't wait for the whole world to look at his husband and sees what he sees, all that talent, all that potential.

But this, right here, Kurt all sleepy and cuddly and heartbreakingly adorable in one of Blaine's old sweaters – this sight is for him and him alone. And he's more grateful for it than he knows how to say.

But, he thinks as he accepts Kurt soft kiss, Kurt knows anyway. Kurt always knows. That's what gets them through the hard days.

He kisses him back and, all things considered, feels very hopeful about the future.


End file.
